27. Candide's Voyage To Constantinople
From Candide by Voltaire (1759)

THE faithful Cacambo had already prevailed on the Turkish captain who was going to carry Sultan Achmet back again to Constantinople, to receive Candide and Martin on board. They both of them embarked, after they had prostrated themselves before his miserable Highness. As Candide was on his way, he said to Martin,

"There were six dethroned kings that we supped with; and what is still more, among these six kings there was one that I gave alms to. Perhaps there may be a great many other princes more unfortunate still. For my own part, I have lost only one hundred sheep, and am flying to the arms of Cunegonde. My dear Martin, I must still say, Pangloss was in the right; all things are for the best."
"I wish they were," said Martin.
"But," said Candide, "the adventure we met with at Venice is something romantic. Such a thing was never before either seen or heard of, that six dethroned kings should sup together at a common inn."
"This is not more extraordinary," replied Martin , "than most of the things that have happened to us. It is a common thing for kings to be dethroned; and with respect to the honour that we had of supping with them, it is a trifle that does not merit our attention."

Scarce had Candide got on board, when he fell on the neck of his old servant and friend Cacambo.

"Well," said he , "what news of Cunegonde? is she still a miracle of beauty? does she love me still? how does she do? No doubt but you have bought a palace for her at Constantinople?"
"My dear master," replied Cacambo , "Cunegonde washes dishes on the banks of the Propontis, for a prince who has very few to wash; she is a slave in the house of an ancient sovereign named Ragotsky, to whom the Grand Turk allows three crowns a day to support him in his asylum; but, what is worse than all, she has lost her beauty, and is become shockingly ugly."
"Well, handsome or ugly," replied Candide , "I am a man of honour, and it is my duty to love her still. But how came she to be reduced to so abject a condition, with the five or six millions that you carried her?"
"Well," said Cacambo , "was I not to give two millions to Signor Don Fernandes d'Ibaraa, y Figueora, y Mascarenes, y Lampourdos, y Souza, the governor of Buenos-Ayres, for permission to take Miss Cunegonde back again, and did not a pirate rob us of the rest? Did not this pirate carry us to Cape Matapan, to Milo, to Nicaria, to Samos, to Dardanelles, to Marmora, to Scutari? Cunegonde and the old woman are servants to the prince I told you of, and I am a slave of the dethroned sultan."
"What a chain of shocking calamities!" said Candide. "But, after all, I have some diamonds, I shall easily purchase Cunegonde's liberty. It is a pity that she is grown so ugly."

Then, turning himself to Martin,

"Who do you think," says he , "is most to be pitied; the Sultan Achmet, the Emperor Ivan, King Charles Edward, or myself?"
"I cannot tell," said Martin , "I must look into your hearts to be able to tell."
"Ah!" said Candide , "if Pangloss were here, he would know and tell us."
"I know not," replied Martin , "in what sort of scales your Pangloss would weigh the misfortunes of mankind, and how he would appraise their sorrows. All that I can venture to say is, that there are millions of men upon earth a hundred times more to be pitied than King Charles Edward, the Emperor Ivan, or Sultan Achmet."
"That may be so," said Candide.

In a few days they reached the Black Sea. Candide began with ransoming Cacambo at an extravagant price; and, without loss of time, he got into a galley with his companions, to go to the banks of the Propontis, in search of Cunegonde, however ugly she might have become.

Among the crew, there were two slaves that rowed very badly, to whose bare shoulders the Levant trader would now and then apply severe strokes with a bull's pizzle. Candide, by a natural sympathy, looked at them more attentively than at the rest of the galley-slaves, and went up to them with a heart full of pity. The features of two of their faces, though very much disfigured, seemed to bear some resemblance to those of Pangloss, and the unfortunate Baron, the brother of Miss Cunegonde. This fancy made him feel very sad. He looked at them again more attentively.

"Really," said he to Cacambo , "if I had not seen the good Pangloss hanged, and had not had the misfortune to kill the Baron myself, I should think it was they who are rowing in this galley."

At the names of the Baron and Pangloss, the two galley-slaves gave a loud shriek, became as if petrified in their seats, and let their oars drop. The master of the Levanter ran up to them, and redoubled the lashes of the bull's pizzle upon them.

"Hold! Hold! Seignior," cried Candide , "I will give you what money you please."
"What! it is Candide!" said one of the galley-slaves. "Oh! it is Candide!" said the other.
"Do I dream?" said Candide , "am I awake? am I in this galley? is that Master Baron whom I killed? is that Master Pangloss whom I saw hanged?"
"It is ourselves! It is our very selves!" they exclaimed.
"What! is that the great philosopher?" said Martin.
"Harkee, Master Levant Captain," said Candide , "what will you take for the ransom of Monsieur Thunder-ten-tronckh, one of the first Barons of the empire, together with Master Pangloss, the most profound metaphysician of Germany?"
"You Christian dog," said the Levant captain , "since these two dogs of Christian slaves are a baron and a metaphysician, which, without doubt, are high dignities in their own country, you shall give me fifty thousand sequins."
"You shall have the money, sir; carry me back again, like lightning, to Constantinople, and you shall be paid directly. But stop, carry me to Miss Cunegonde first."

The Levant captain, on the first offer of Candide, had turned the head of the vessel towards the city, and made the other slaves row faster than a bird cleaves the air.

Candide embraced the Baron and Pangloss a hundred times.

"How happened it that I did not kill you, my dear Baron? and, my dear Pangloss, how came you to life again, after being hanged? and how came both of you to be galley-slaves in Turkey?"
"Is it true that my dear sister is in this country?" said the Baron.
"Yes," replied Cacambo.
"Then I see my dear Candide once more," said Pangloss. .

Candide presented Martin and Cacambo to them; the whole party mutually embraced, and all spoke at the same time. The galley flew like lightning, and they were already in the port. A Jew was sent for, to whom Candide sold a diamond for fifty thousand sequins, which was worth a hundred thousand, the Israelite swearing by Abraham that he could not give any more. He immediately paid the ransom of the Baron and Pangloss. The latter threw himself at the feet of his deliverer, and bathed them with his tears; as for the other, he thanked him with a nod, and promised to repay him the money the first opportunity.

"But is it possible that my sister is in Turkey?" said he.
"Nothing is more possible," replied Cacambo , "for she scours dishes in the house of a prince of Transylvania!"

Two more Jews were instantly sent for, to whom Candide sold some more diamonds; and he and his party all set out again, in another galley, to go and deliver Cunegonde.

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